Most people on dating apps are looking for real connection — but scammers are there too, using fake profiles and sweet words to steal money. Here is how to spot them early.
🎭 How a romance scam usually works
- A perfect profileAttractive photos, a great job — often abroad, on an oil rig, in the army or as a doctor with an NGO.
- Fast, intense affectionWithin days they say “I love you”, call you their wife or husband and talk about the future.
- Move off the appThey push you to WhatsApp or Telegram quickly, where the app can’t protect you.
- Excuses not to meetVideo calls “don’t work”, trips are always cancelled at the last minute.
- The emergencyA hospital bill, customs fee, stuck parcel, visa or flight ticket — and they need money urgently.
- More and more requestsOnce you pay, there is always another problem. It does not stop until you stop.
🚩 Red flags to watch for
Model-like pictures with no casual everyday shots. They may be stolen.
Check photosAlways an excuse — bad camera, bad network, at work.
Big flagGift cards, crypto, transfers or “investment opportunities”. Real partners don’t ask strangers for money.
Biggest flagDetails about their job, location or family keep changing.
InconsistentThey “sent you a gift” and you must pay to release it.
Classic trickThey tell you not to tell friends or family about the relationship.
IsolationNever send money, gift cards, crypto, your BVN, bank details or intimate photos to someone you have not met in person. Intimate photos are sometimes used for blackmail (sextortion).
🔍 Simple checks you can do
- Do a reverse image search of their photos (Google Lens or similar) to see if they appear under other names.
- Ask for a live video call early — a real person will agree.
- Search their name, phone number and story online — other victims may have posted.
- Talk to a trusted friend: an outside view helps when feelings are strong.
☕ Meeting safely
- Meet in a public placeA busy restaurant or mall during the day.
- Tell someoneShare where you are going, who you are meeting and when you expect to return.
- Arrange your own transportDon’t accept a lift to an unknown place on the first meeting.
- Trust your instinctsIf something feels wrong, leave. You don’t owe anyone an explanation.
